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Attention à votre syntaxe

J'ai trouvé cet article sur slate.fr:

NB: j'aime bien l'expression "une rencontre éclair" (speed dating?)

"Vous rêvez d'un couple stable et durable? Faites attention aux mots que vous utilisez: ils pourraient avoir un rôle à jouer dans la longévité de votre relation amoureuse, met en garde le Guardian.
C'est en tout cas ce que révèle une étude américaine publiée sur Psychological Science.
«Nous savons que les personnes tendent à  être attirées, à fréquenter, et à se marier avec ceux qui leur ressemblent en termes de personnalité, valeurs, et aspect physique, lit-on dans la présentation de l'étude. Tout de même, ces caractéristiques ne montrent que la surface de ce qui fait fonctionner une relation. La façon dont les gens parlent est aussi importante. Cette nouvelle étude montre que les personnes qui se ressemblent dans leur façon de parler sont plus compatibles.»
L'étude ne s'est pas penchée sur les noms ou les verbes, mais sur les mots fonctionnels, c'est-à-dire les articles, les pronoms, et certains adverbes.

D'après le professeur James Pennebaker, de l'université du Texas, qui a codirigé l'étude, ce sont ces mots qui constituent notre façon d'écrire et de parler. Les couples qui les emploient de la même façon ont des relations meilleurs et plus longues. Les chercheurs se sont demandé si le style écrit et parlé qu'on adopte permet de déterminer le comportement qu'on aura avec notre futur partenaire, ainsi que la durée de cette relation. Pour ce faire, ils ont conduit deux expériences avec l'aide d'un programme informatique qui permet de comparer le style de langage des partenaires.
Dans la première expérience, les chercheurs ont organisé des rencontres éclair de 4 minutes entre deux étudiants, et ont enregistré leurs conversations. Presque tous les potentiels couples ont eu les mêmes sujets de conversation: leurs études, d'où ils viennent, et s'ils aiment l'université.
«Toutes les conversations se ressemblaient, mais l'analyse du texte a permis de détecter de véritables différences dans la synchronie du langage, explique James Pennebaker. Les couples dont le style de langage se ressemblait le plus avaient quatre fois plus de chances de vouloir se revoir que les autres.»
La deuxième expérience confirme l'importance du langage dans le couple. Les chercheurs ont analysé pendant 10 jours des conversations par chat entre des couples. Près de 80% des couples ayant le même style d'écriture étaient toujours ensemble 3 mois après l'étude, alors que ce n'était le cas que de 54% pour ceux dont le style divergeait.
«Ce que les gens se disent est important, mais la façon dont ils le disent est peut-être encore plus révélatrice», explique le professeur Pennebaker. Qui conclut:
«Ce qui est formidable c'est que ce n'est pas notre choix, ça sort juste de notre bouche. Les gens n'ont pas conscience de synchroniser leurs discours.»"

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